we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
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Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
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Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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