forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize