come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
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Heyyyy darlin are you busy?
Why hello drunk Jake. It's sober Sarah, I'll tell drunk Sarah you booty called. She'll probably be around tomorrow night.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
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