Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
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