Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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