woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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