We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize