My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
You need Xanax blowdarts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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