my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
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