I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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