think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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