he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
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Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
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