and next time when you feel me up, do it right
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize