you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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