I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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