My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize