you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
You can't special order awesome
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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