what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
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I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
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The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
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