Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Randomize