I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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