May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
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