R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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