I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
This is my gift to your gina
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
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