I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize