please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cat food counts as protein by the way
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
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