If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize