I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize