I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize