after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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