Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
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