Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize