Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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