Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
sex in a hospital.. check
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize