Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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