somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
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