we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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