I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize