I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize