Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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