and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
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