How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
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