It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
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