you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize