how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize