are you still at the devil's house?
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize