I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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