I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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