he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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