My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
She said her name was "party"
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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