So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
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I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize